March 7th, 2008
NOTE FROM CARL:
The topic speaks for itself…
The Top 8 Sentences
What Never Need Be Said
What Never Need Be Said
8> “In retrospect, working on the callouses on my feet with a cheese grater was not a good idea.”
7> “Grandma forgot her underpants again!”
6> “Well, I don’t think *I’d* want to gargle horse semen.”
5> “Wow, when I popped that pimple, it shot almost three feet to the mirror!”
4> “I’ll bet you get comments all the time about how large and asymmetrical your breasts are.”
3> “You are beautiful! I can already tell you’ll be the latest addition to my masturbatory fantasies.”
2> “Pleased to meet you. Please accept my condolences on being so fat.”
and the Number 1 Sentence What Never Need Be Said …
1> “I’m fine, thanks, except for the rectal acne.”
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Credits:
Selected from 26 submissions from 8 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:
Brad Hamer, Austin, TX — 1, 2, 3 (Hat trick!) (13th #1!)
Douglas Frank, Crosby, TX — 4
Mark Weiss, Austin, TX — 5, 6, 8 (Hat trick!)
Jill Gallagher, Seattle, WA — 7
Carl Knorr, Devo City, OH — GrandObserver,ObtuseFunny
