Warm Tossed Foods

NOTE FROM CARL:

Showdown September continues! Let’s Get
Ready To Wooooonnderrrrrrrr!

The Top 8 Reasons Vomit
Is Better Than Cinder Blocks

8> If you slip and fall in your own cinder blocks you could break something.

7> Stand-Up Comedy Laugh Scale: Vomit = 8.5. Cinder blocks = –2.

6> Build a house out of vomit, and the big bad wolf won’t come anywhere near it.

5> Cinder blocks won’t remind you what you had for dinner.

4> If you were hit by projectile cinder blocks, it would take more than a shower to make it right.

3> Because I made it myself!

2> Ask any roadie. To get the full oomph oomph out of a six foot sub-woofer you can’t just weigh it down; you need to stick it firmly to the stage.

and the Number 1 Reason Vomit Is Better Than Cinder Blocks …

1> In the dorm, nobody tries to steal your vomit to make stereo shelves.

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Credits:

Selected from 31 submissions from 9 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:

Douglas Frank, Crosby, TX — 1, 3, Topic, Banner tag (10th #1)
Peter Casper, Brisbane, Australia — 2
Mark Weiss, Austin, TX — 4
Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL — 5, 6
David Bloyer, Comer, GA — 7, 8
Kim Walker-Daniels, Sun Prairie, WI — 7
Carl Knorr, Devo City, OH — GrandObserver,ObtuseFunny

RUNNERS UP list — Concreeps

Normally, vomit is more colorful.
(Dave Oberhart, Durham, NC)
(Peter Casper, Brisbane, Australia)

Vomit doesn’t make you pay attention to those annoying “Head On” commercials.
(Trish Jensen, Reedsville, PA)

Vomit is more toilet friendly.
(Trish Jensen, Reedsville, PA)

You can carry vomit around internally.
(Dave Oberhart, Durham, NC)

You can smash your head into a load of vomit without hurting yourself.
(Dave Oberhart, Durham, NC)

You’ll only be indicted for involuntary manslaughter with vomit. Cinder blocks? You’re looking at 20 to life, my friend.
(Trish Jensen, Reedsville, PA)