April 14th, 2006
The Top 6 Reasons to
Bludgeon a Clown With a Raw Fish
Bludgeon a Clown With a Raw Fish
6> Because the body-pierced and speedo-sporting “clowns” in the Cirque du Soleil have scarred my 5-year-old for life.
5> It feels good to catch your weapons yourself.
4> As if you need a reason.
3> Because we’ve shoved all the lobsters down the underpants of mimes.
2> Cooked fish fall apart.
and the Number 1 Reason to Bludgeon a Clown With a Raw Fish…
1> Bitch set me up!
.
Credits:
Selected from 24 submissions from 8 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:
Brad Simanek, Cedar Rapids, IA — 1 (Woo-hoo! 1st #1!)
Marcelo Rinesi, Buenos Aires, Argentina — 2
Bill Muse, Seattle, WA — 2
Lars Eisenberg, Menomonie, WI — 3
Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL — 4
Jody LaFerriere, Leominster, MA — 5
Colleen Stemanczek, Houston, TX — 6
Carl Knorr, Devo City, OH — Topic
Peter Casper, Brisbane, Australia — Banner tag
Carl Knorr, Devo City, OH — Grand Overseer of
Obscure Funniness (GOOF)
RUNNERS UP list — Floppy Shoes Got No Sole
Because a Hefty bag full of pig intestines is much more likely to
burst open and ruin his makeup.
(Larry Hollister, Concord, CA)
Go ahead… make another lent joke, Floppo!
(Lars Eisenberg, Menomonie, WI)
If you don’t, the clowns will win.
(Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL)
It’s just what park rangers do.
(Jody LaFerriere, Leominster, MA)
Keeps them from passing out into Billy’s birthday cake.
(Lars Eisenberg, Menomonie, WI)
(Larry Hollister, Concord, CA)
Go ahead… make another lent joke, Floppo!
(Lars Eisenberg, Menomonie, WI)
If you don’t, the clowns will win.
(Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL)
It’s just what park rangers do.
(Jody LaFerriere, Leominster, MA)
Keeps them from passing out into Billy’s birthday cake.
(Lars Eisenberg, Menomonie, WI)
