NOTE FROM CARL:

Boss’s Day is Monday October 16.
Your fellow cube-monkeys here at
Top5 WTF thought we’d help you with
gift ideas for that boss who *really*
chews your ass 40 hours a week.

The Top 7 Gifts to Buy Your
Cannibalistic Boss for Boss’s Day

7> Same thing you give him every day… a piece of your mind.

6> An apron that says “World’s Best Cook (is in this soup).”

5> A juicy Phil A. Mignon, with a nice bottle of Merle O.

4> Job applications and resumes from seasoned professionals.

3> Richard Simmons. Just because.

2> A year’s subscription to the Delinquent-Cubicle-Peon-Ass of the Month Club.

and the Number 1 Gift to Buy Your Cannibalistic Boss for Boss’s Day…

1> Bumper sticker that reads, “My I.T. Department — The Other White Meat.”

.

Credits:

Selected from 32 submissions from 10 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:

Brad Osberg, Calgary, AB — 1 (2nd #1!)
Brad Simanek, Cedar Rapids, IA — 2
Trish Jensen, Reedsville, PA — 3
Larry Hollister, Concord, CA — 4
Douglas Frank, Crosby, TX — 5
Josh Sinnett, Bellingham, WA — 6, 7
Brad Hamer, Austin, TX — Topic
Carl Knorr, Devo City, OH — Grand Overseer of Obtuse Funniness (GOOF)

RUNNERS UP list — Browned Nosers

A case of A-Juan steak sauce.
(Douglas Frank, Crosby, TX)

If you are in HR, a nice card with a little note letting him know all future hires will be certified 100% organic.
(Brad Osberg, Calgary, AB)

Invite the whole office over to your house that evening for a lovely Donner party.
(Brad Hamer, Austin, TX)

Jeffrey Dahmer’s “Asian Capon Sweetbread Cookbook.”
(Brad Simanek, Cedar Rapids, IA)

“Let’s all give the boss a great big hand!”
(Brad Hamer, Austin, TX)

Some Lynn Guini with Clem sauce.
(Douglas Frank, Crosby, TX)

The director’s cut of “Eating Raoul.”
(Mark Weiss, Austin, TX)