June 16th, 2006
NOTE FROM CARL:
In honor of Father’s Day…
The Top 7 Answers
to “Who’s Your Daddy?”
to “Who’s Your Daddy?”
7> The guy in the pro-choice T-shirt.
6> I’m not sure of his name, but I gather he had exact change.
5> Donor #100457-3.
4> spermprovider@aol.com
3> Same as you, silly. This is Arkansas!
2> The Soul-Searching Pre-Op Transsexual Formerly Known as Cletus.
and the Number 1 Who’s Your Daddy?…
1> Gruuuumphphzzzhht! (Translation: “Why does this ball-gag taste like chicken?”)
.
Credits:
Selected from 19 submissions from 6 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:
Brad Osberg, Calgary, AB — 1, 3 (Woo-hoo! 1st #1!)
Brad Simanek, Cedar Rapids, IA — 2, 5
Jody LaFerriere, Leominster, MA — 4, 7
Mark Weiss, Austin, TX — 5
Jeffrey Anbinder, New York, NY — 6
Larry Hollister, Concord, CA — Runner-Up List Name
Carl Knorr, Devo City, OH — Grand Overseer of Obtuse Funniness (GOOF)
RUNNERS UP list — Pa Thetic
According to the terms of the restraining order, I’m not supposed
to say it in public.
(Jody LaFerriere, Leominster, MA)
Art. In Heaven.
(Larry Hollister, Concord, CA)
As opposed to your older and younger sisters, it was actually your mother’s husband.
(Mark Weiss, Austin, TX)
Mom says she doesn’t know his name, but he had the biggest bong she had ever seen.
(Mark Weiss, Austin, TX)
Zeus. You know, came down from Olympus disguised as a shower of gold to secretly impregnate a mortal woman. At least, that’s Mom’s story.
(Larry Hollister, Concord, CA)
(Jody LaFerriere, Leominster, MA)
Art. In Heaven.
(Larry Hollister, Concord, CA)
As opposed to your older and younger sisters, it was actually your mother’s husband.
(Mark Weiss, Austin, TX)
Mom says she doesn’t know his name, but he had the biggest bong she had ever seen.
(Mark Weiss, Austin, TX)
Zeus. You know, came down from Olympus disguised as a shower of gold to secretly impregnate a mortal woman. At least, that’s Mom’s story.
(Larry Hollister, Concord, CA)
