July 14th, 2006
NOTE FROM CARL:
WTF is joining the TopFive Family on
its two-week hiatus. Oh, I know what
you’re thinking… and I’ve got your
answer RIGHT HERE!
its two-week hiatus. Oh, I know what
you’re thinking… and I’ve got your
answer RIGHT HERE!
The Top 6 Answers to the Question
“Just Where Do You Think You’re Going?”
“Just Where Do You Think You’re Going?”
6> To get my joint back out of the evidence locker.
5> The pub to get shit-faced and perve at the topless barmaids. Dad’s driving.
4> To my mandatory diversity/sensitivity training class, you stupid dago.
3> Purple nipple monkey applebutter.
2> I am following the sacred path of the Holy One, Mr. Ted Nugent, so stand aside lest I smite thee with a torque wrench.
and the Number 1 Answer to the Question “Just Where Do You Think You’re Going?”
1> To your mama’s house. My tenth one’s free.
.
Credits:
Selected from 32 submissions from 8 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:
Bill Muse, Seattle, WA — 1, 4 (2nd #1)
J.J. Gertler, Alexandria, VA — 2, Banner tag
Rabbi Crut, McComb, OH — 3
Peter Casper, Brisbane, Australia — 5
Brad Simanek, Cedar Rapids, IA — 6
Mary Ann McDonald, Sacramento, CA — Runner-Up List Name
Carl Knorr, Devo City, OH — Grand Overseer of Obtuse Funnin
RUNNERS UP list — Nowhere Man
Back to the orphanage to wait for less-nosy parents.
(Peter Casper, Brisbane, Australia)
I thought I’d take a quick spin down to the Library of Trite Motherly Cliches.
(Larry Hollister, Concord, CA)
It may be *my* colostomy bag that burst, but it’s *your* house and I can still run pretty damn fast.
(Brad Simanek, Cedar Rapids, IA)
It should be fairly obvious; see my handbasket?
(Mary Ann McDonald, Sacramento, CA)
My friends are all marching to jump off a cliff, and I’d hate to be late!
(Mary Ann McDonald, Sacramento, CA)
Same as always, to do what the voices tell me to do.
(Mark Weiss, Austin, TX)
(Peter Casper, Brisbane, Australia)
I thought I’d take a quick spin down to the Library of Trite Motherly Cliches.
(Larry Hollister, Concord, CA)
It may be *my* colostomy bag that burst, but it’s *your* house and I can still run pretty damn fast.
(Brad Simanek, Cedar Rapids, IA)
It should be fairly obvious; see my handbasket?
(Mary Ann McDonald, Sacramento, CA)
My friends are all marching to jump off a cliff, and I’d hate to be late!
(Mary Ann McDonald, Sacramento, CA)
Same as always, to do what the voices tell me to do.
(Mark Weiss, Austin, TX)
