The Top 9 Unexpected
Tasks of the Pope’s Assistant

9> Sharpen the miter every three months or 3,000 masses.

8> Catalog and organize the Holy Father’s extensive collection of sports blooper videos.

7> Every day, wipe lip prints off his ring and backside.

6> That covered dish that looks like communion wafers? Keep it stocked with Cool Ranch Doritos.

5> Polish the Holy Grail.

4> Daily update of the “__ Days Without a Molestation Charge” chart.

3> Reset his pacemaker to Daylight Savings Time.

2> Surf the Web to make sure he’s up on the latest Polish jokes.

and the Number 1 Unexpected Task of the Pope’s Assistant…

1> Make sure he’s wearing something under that robe.

.

Credits:

Selected from 20 submissions from 2 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

William Wickart, Hillsboro, OR — 1, 2, 3, 6, 7 (Hat trick!)
(Employee of the week!)
Brad Wilkerson, El Sobrante, CA — 4, 5, 8, 9 (Hat trick!)
James Knowles, Bellingham, WA — Topic
K.W. Wyckham, Youngstown, OH — Banner Tag
Wade Kwon, Birmingham, AL — President & CEO