The Top 9 Perks of Being Unemployed

9> No one is hassling you about the length of your lunch break, or that office supplies are missing, or the ass-print on the copier, or…

8> Casual Fridays have been replaced by Naked Every Days.

7> You get to brush up on your creative writing skills while working on your resume.

6> Now instead of the boss *and* the spouse screaming at you every day, it’s just the spouse.

5> Twenty-two hours of sleep a night, baby!

4> No more sitting at your desk, wondering if you wife is at home cheating on you.

3> Binoculars, a cell phone and a police scanner, and you *are* Mr. Neighborhood Watch.

2> You *never* miss the ice cream truck.

and the Number 1 Perk of Being Unemployed…

1> Finally outsmarted the government! They can’t take half my paycheck if I’m not getting one!

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Credits:

Selected from 24 submissions from 8 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

Rabbi Crut, Bowling Green, OH — 1, 9