Previous list: 
November 5, 2007
occasion, we take a nostalgic look back at…
Moments in NBA History
10> 1969: Bill Russell bids a tearful farewell to the Boston
Celtics and embarks on his new dream, to play shortstop for
the LA Dodgers.
9> 1998: The Portland Trailblazers temporarily ruin their team
chemistry by foolishly drafting a “good apple”.
8> 2003: Nike chooses Kobe Bryant for their “Just Do It”
marketing campaign.
7> 1990: Roy Tarpley calls a time out so he can do a line off a
Laker Girl’s ass.
6> 1971: Walt “Clyde” Frazier, on a rainy day in Austin, walks
into a Sears and purchases a suit valued at under $1,000.
5> 1991: Darryl Dawkins attempts an embarrassing comeback,
shattering a backboard with a hammer concealed in his shorts.
4> 1966: Rick Barry pioneers the underhanded free throw. Boys
nationwide trade their basketballs for footballs.
3> 2003: David Stern rigs the lottery hopper incorrectly, thus
allowing somebody other than the Knicks to draft Lebron James.
2> 1979: Robert Parish fractures his jaw while attempting to
smile.
victory tampon.
Selected from 42 submissions from 14 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:
Bill Muse, Seattle, WA — 1, 4, 5 (Hat trick, 57th #1)
Mark Weiss, Austin, TX — 2
Carl Knorr, Devo City, OH — 3
David G. Scott, Kansas City, MO — 6
Mark D. Sabien, What Cheer, IA — 7
Trish Jensen, Reedsville, PA — 8
Larry Hollister, Concord, CA — 9, Commissioner
Lloyd Babcock, Flagstaff, AZ — 10
nickname “Red”, dismissing his friend’s far cleverer
“Set-Your-Clocks-One”.
(Lloyd Babcock, Flagstaff, AZ)
1960: Wilt Chamberlain almost totally screws up his math by
accidentally having sex twice with the same woman.
(Larry Hollister, Concord, CA)
1974: High-schooler Bill Laimbeer almost quits the game after
being informed that an elbow to your opponent’s ribcage
constitutes a “foul”.
(Bill Reilly, Golden, CO)
1977: The NBA absorbs the San Antonio Spurs with the ABA merger,
unwittingly damning itself to a dynasty of boring-as-all-hell
fundamentally superb champions on and off the court every June,
thus trivializing the previous eight months’ “work” of
gun-wielding strip-club derelict millionaires.
(Carl Knorr, Devo City, OH)
1993: Michael Jordan takes advantage of a break in his schedule to
spend a relaxing afternoon at the batting cage.
(Bill Reilly, Golden, CO)
1997: Washington’s Director Of Marketing gets shot one day after
the team officially changes their name from the Bullets to the
Wizards.
(Jeff Rabinowitz, Wilkes-Barre, PA)
1999: Shaquille O’Neal loses a game of HORSE to a ball boy.
(Bill Muse, Seattle, WA)
2002: Mark Cuban nixes deal to purchase Italy’s Kinder Bologna
when he learns it’s not good-natured lunchmeat.
(Mark D. Sabien, What Cheer, IA)
2005: NBA decides to pilot test program to get players and fans
more involved. First test city: Detroit.
(Vic Vitek, Hopewell Junction, NY)