NOTE FROM JOHN:

Today is H.G. Wells’s birthday. He’d be
135 years old, not counting time travel.

The Top 6 Ways to
Celebrate H.G. Wells’s Birthday

6> Mooncalf burgers!

5> Get the lard butt some Slim Fast. Wait… does the “H” or the “G” stand for “David?”

4> Hire a hooker to dress up like an Eloi. Put on your Morlock suit and party like it’s 799,999!

3> Keep digging! Party at the Center of the Earth!

2> Same as every year; go downtown with my Eloi honey and diss the west-coast Morlocks.

and the Number 1 Way to Celebrate H.G. Wells’s Birthday…

1> Invisible lap dances!

.

Credits:

Selected from 28 submissions from 10 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

Wade Kwon, Birmingham, AL — 1 (3rd #1)
Guy Payne, Birmingham, AL — 2
Steve Laskoske, Sinking Spring, PA — 3
David Goudsward, Harrisburg, PA — 4
Joseph Moore, Concord, CA — 5
Charles d’Olive, Waterloo, IA — 6
Jeffrey Anbinder, New York City — Topic
John Mozena, Grosse Pointe Woods, MI — Prime Director
Herbert George Wells, London, England — Birthday Boy