NOTE FROM DAVE:

This list was originally published on Friday, July 1, 2050.
As you can see, we’ve done the impossible once
again and reached into the future for yet another
classic list. It’s a good thing we’re doing it
now, since in 2050 I’ll be 88 years old.

The Top 10 Things We
Miss About Washington D. C.

10> The Middle East Peace War Memorial was awesome. The 150,000 names on it secretly spelled out anti-Bush statements!

9> The way the mutant Kennedy clones could suck bourbon from a glass ten feet away.

8> The backroom séances that allowed Greenspan to keep his hand on monetary policy at the Fed.

7> Actually standing in the Library of Congress instead of just accessing it online via my implant.

6> The opening day of lawyer season.

5> The huge holographic screen above the White House showing her current approval rating.

4> The crater. No, not the big one that’s there now, but the smaller one on the Mall where the UFO crashed after trying to abduct both Rush Limbaugh *and* Michael Moore!

3> Making congresscritters heads explode by shooting them with honesty rays.

2> The contest between the U.S. Treasury and the U.S. Congress to see who could produce the most worthless paper.

and the Number 1 Thing We Miss About Washington D. C….

1> That rude yet strangely erotic thing the invading aliens in their donut shaped craft would do to the Washington Monument.

.

Credits:

Selected from 31 submissions from 9 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:

James Knowles, Bellingham, WA — 1, 3, 9 (Hat trick!)
Dan Thompson, Austin, TX — 2, 6, 7, 8 (Hat trick!)
Bill Livingston, Decatur, AL — 4
Scott Elmer, Wheaton, IL — 5
Douglas Bishop, Fort Wayne, IN — 10, Topic
Dave Oberhart, Durham, NC — SF List Moderator