November 24, 2006     

The Top 10 Things SF
Characters Are Thankful For

10> Bruce Wayne: The ability to instill a dark, terrifying fear
of retribution in criminal scum everywhere. That, and Alfred’s
pot roast.

9> Dr. Smith: The absolutely endless patience and bottomless
depths of gullibility of the entire Robinson family.

8> Yoda: “For menus of children, high turnstiles in subway and
doggie doors, thankful am I!”

7> Captain Kirk is thankful for gullible alien women.

6> Darth Vader: Johnny Cash’s garage sales.

5> Jonnie Goodboy Tyler, his fellow man-animals and all the
Psychlos are extremely thankful no sequels to “Battlefield
Earth” exist. That book alone was quite embarrassing enough.

4> Zaphod Beeblebrox: President Clinton’s fine example of how to
run a government.

3> That SF women *PREFER* slinky, sexy, *VERY* revealing
outfits!

2> Colonel Steve Austin: 2-for-1 WD-40 coupons.

and the Number 1 Thing SF Characters Are Thankful For …

1> Lazarus Long: Mother’s love.

.

Credits:

Selected from 33 submissions from 9 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:

Donald Johnson, Cincinnati, OH — 1, 4, 6 (Hat trick!), Topic
Jim Carroll, Bedford, NH — 2
Tom Rodman, Durham, NC — 3
Mary Ann McDonald, Sacramento, CA — 5
Guy Reeves, Houston, TX — 7
Barry Wallace, Knoxville, TN — 8
Mark David, Sunnyvale, CA — 9
Bill Livingston, Decatur, AL — 10
Dave Oberhart, Durham, NC — SF List Moderator