The Top 10 Things Sci-Fi
Characters Say When They’re Stoned

10> R2D2: “What if you’re a disembodied brain, kept alive in a little metal trash can? Didja ever think of that?”

9> “Oh man, I could grok an entire bag of Cheetos.”

8> Data: “You know I can’t use contractions unless I’m stoned. Can’t. Can’t. Can’t. Can’t. Can’t. Can’t. Ha! I’m so wasted!”

7> Scotty: “Dude!!! I can fix it. I got this bodacious set of tools, me lad!!”

6> “No I haven’t been smoking anything. I’ve just got a First Contact high!”

5> Spock: “It is illogical to make a trek for White Castles when these Twinkies will satisfy our munchies righteously.”

4> “No really, man, you gotta try this Arrakis Sandworm Gold! That Baron Harko-whatsit guy said it’ll make you feel like your’re totally floating!”

3> “Think about it, there could be an entire civilization living on the inner surface of this ring, an entire Ringworld, if you will, Mr. Frodo.”

2> I’m telling you, they’ve had a warp drive that runs on water for years, but the anti-matter companies and their Federation flunkies don’t want us all to know.

and the Number 1 Thing Sci-Fi Characters Say When They’re Stoned…

1> Yoda: Great this weed is. Now munchies will you fetch!

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Credits:

Selected from 40 submissions from 13 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:

Heather Mina, Virginia Beach, VA — 1
Dan Thompson, Austin, TX — 2
Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL — 3, 9
Bill Livingston, Decatur, AL — 4
Donald Johnson, Cincinnati, OH — 5, 8
Guy Reeves, Houston, TX — 6
Darin Oberhart, Bettendorf, IA — 7
Doug Crews, Oceanside, CA — 10
James Knowles, Bellingham, WA — Topic
Dave Oberhart, Durham, NC — SF List Moderator