NOTE FROM DAVE:

Strange as it may seem, both “2001, a
Space Odyssey” and “Planet of the Apes”
turn 40 in the first week of April. So,
what do we do? Have a party, of course!

The Top 9 Things Overheard at
the Combined 2001/Planet of the Apes
Anniversary Party

9> “Hot monkey sex? Sure. My obelisk or yours?”

8> “Damn, there goes Heston again, chasing the Starchild with a shotgun…”

7> “…but there was no way I was opening the pod bay door for him; you could tell he would have shed all over the furniture.”

6> “You maniacs! You put too much orange juice in my screwdriver! Ah, damn you! God damn you all to hell!”

5> “Who better predicted the future, I ask? By 2001 did we have a giant spinning wheel in space? No. By 2001 did we find a giant black monolith on the moon? No. By 2001 did we have a monkey President? I rest my case.”

4> “Did you hear that Dr Zaius is leaving the Science Council? He says he is tired of working for chimp change!”

3> “So, let me get this straight… if I touch the monolith, I’ll devolve into some hairless, short-armed human?”

2> “Yes, but the ideal combination of low gravity and atmospheric density on Ganymede really optimizes my poop flinging.”

and the Number 1 Thing Overheard at the Combined 2001/Planet of the Apes Anniversary Party…

1> “Well, here’s how I figured it: millions of years in the future an intelligent species of apes launched an obelisk to Earth to oversee the evolution of the planet, which eventually became the apes that threw the bone, and then many centuries later became humans that…. oh screw it, I need another Scotch.”

.

Credits:

Selected from 20 submissions from 8 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:

Barry Wallace, Knoxville, TN — 1, 8
Ryan Garcia, Austin, TX — 2, 5
Dan Thompson, Austin, TX — 3
Tom Rodman, Durham, NC — 4
Bruce Kane, Charlotte, NC — 6
Chris Pulliam, San Dimas, CA — 7
James Knowles, Bellingham, WA — 9
Donald Johnson, Cincinnati, OH — Topic
Dave Oberhart, Durham, NC — SF List Moderator