NOTE FROM DAVE:

According to the buzz from the helm of Paramount’s
“Enterprise,” one of the goals for the fourth season
is to “bring the franchise full circle by touching on
issues from the original series” in order to bring
“Enterprise” back to her roots. Here are our suggestions.

The Top 8 Things From the Old “Star
Trek” We’d Like to See in “Enterprise”

8> More schlocky aliens — especially ones that look like fried eggs!

7> Redshirt Iron Cage Death Match! (The winner actually gets his name in the credits.)

6> Thinly disguised metaphors for racial strife.

5> Tacky retro special effects.

4> More wearing of outlandish costumes and makeup — especially silver lame!

3> Archer/Spock fan fiction.

2> A scene where Kirk’s grandfather gets exposed to dangerous radiation, causing a… genetic… speech… impediment.

and the Number 1 Thing From the Old “Star Trek” We’d Like to See
in “Enterprise”…

1> Archer with his shirt off, fighting a Gorn — no, wait! Better yet, T’Pol with her shirt off, fighting a Gorn — no, even better! T’Pol with her shirt off, fighting an Orion slave girl. Oooh, with her shirt off too! In jello!

.

Credits:

Selected from 26 submissions from 8 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

Guy Payne, Birmingham, AL — 1, 5, 6 (Hat trick!)
James Knowles, Bellingham, WA — 2, Topic
RW Lipp, Lenexa, KS — 3
Mary Ann McDonald, Sacramento, CA — 4, 8
Kim Walker-Daniels, Sun Prairie, WI — 7
Dave Oberhart, Durham, NC — Starfleet Academy
Class of ‘38