NOTE FROM GREG:

You know, this whole Matrix thing got me to
thinking… how is Keanu Reeves “The One” anything?

The Top 9 Signs You Aren’t “The One”

9> “There is no talent.”

8> Your theme song is “Still the One” by Orleans.

7> You carry a large foam rubber finger around with you.

6> The only way you could be The One is if the Matrix runs on a 56K AOL dialup, Chester.

5> Exhibit A: Trinity’s restraining order.

4> At the sound of a gunshot, you tend to leap into the arms of the nearest person.

3> Several appearances in Doublemint gum commercials.

2> “Jethro! Quit a-kick-boxin’ with the chickens and gather them eggs like I told you!”

and the Number 1 Sign You Aren’t “The One”…

1> Right there on your driver’s license, it says “The Four.”

.

Credits:

Selected from 28 submissions from 8 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

Larry Hollister, Concord, CA — 1
Guy Payne, Birmingham, AL — 2
Rabbi Crut, Bowling Green, OH — 3, 6
Martin Bredeck, Hybla Valley, VA — 4, 5
Dave Oberhart, Durham, NC — 7, 8
Lisa Comeau, Toronto, Canada — 9
Mary Ann McDonald, Sacramento, CA — RU list name, HM list name
Greg Preece, Toronto, Canada — Dark Lord Of The Sith