NOTE FROM GREG:

It seems your noble moderator has been too “busy”
with “work” to get lists and topics out. This
could also be because he’s either “lazy” or
“making out with Renee Zellweger.”

The Top 9 Science Fiction Punishments
for a Moderator Who’s Not Doing His Job

9> Roll for wandering monsters.

8> Hack into his hard drive and delete “nude7of9.mov.”

7> Take away his Blade Runner “director’s cut” DVD. And his porn.

6> Force him to invite Wil Wheaton to his house for a weekend retreat

5> Cancel his show after four beautiful seasons, and then do not have the decency to take the “To Be Continued” off the ending.



4> Set Phaser to stun. Shoot moderator in crotch once for each time he has failed to send out a list.

3> Freeze him in Carbonite. Or lime Jell-O. Whatever.

2> While he’s making out with Renee Zellweger, use your psychic powers to make him think he’s making out with Richard Gere.

and the Number 1 Science Fiction Punishment for a Moderator Who’s
Not Doing His Job…

1> He is to be taken to the Dune Sea, and cast into the pit of Carkoon, the nesting place of the all-powerful Sarlaac. There, in his belly, he will find a new definition of pain and suffering as he is slowly digested over a thousand years. That, or given a wedgie.

.

Credits:

Selected from 25 submissions from 7 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL — 1
Guy Payne, Birmingham, AL — 2
Wayne Kierstead, Clackamas, OR — 3, 7
Jenna Clay, Owensboro, KY — 4, 5, 8 (Hat trick!)
Dave Oberhart, Durham, NC — 6
Steven Shehori, Toronto, ON — 9
Greg Preece, Toronto, ON — Dark Lord Of The Sith