Previous list: 
July 13, 2007
Potter story hits theatres everywhere.
Here are some things you probably missed.
Potter and the Order of the Phoenix”
10> The revelation of what “really” happened between Prof.
Umbridge and all of those handsome, virile centaurs.
9> Hogwarts bans all students from spell-sharing on their
iWands.
8> Malfoy unfurls a banner declaring, “Bong Hits 4 Voldemort!”
7> Desperate to be a real part of the Weasley clan, Harry zaps
his hair a horrifying shade of fire-engine red. Complete with
fire engine.
6> Hermione shops for training bras in Diagon Alley with Hagrid.
5> Voldemort, incensed by the Death Eater’s inability to secure
an iPhone at launch, turns Steve Jobs into a newt. Yes, he
gets better.
4> Hilarious episode where Ron absentmindedly scratches his
scrotum with his wand and ends up having to borrow Hagrid’s
wheelbarrow.
3> Nosing about in Dumbledore’s private Penseive stash, Harry
pays an appalling price for his curiosity when he becomes
trapped in an erotic scene involving Dolores Umbridge and a
Blast-Ended Skrewt.
2> In his final scene, Dumbledore winks at the camera and says,
“Hey kids, guess what! I die in the next one!”
right before a performance of the Hogwart’s female high kick
cheerleading squad.
Selected from 40 submissions from 13 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:
Donald Johnson, Cincinnati, OH — 1, 4
Barry Wallace, Knoxville, TN — 2, 6
Larry Hollister, Concord, CA — 3
Ryan Garcia, Austin, TX — 5
Jennifer A. Ford, Fort Wayne, IN — 7
Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL — 8, 9
Pat Bailey, Bremerton WA — 10
Dave Oberhart, Durham, NC — SF List Moderator
any Hufflepuff using too much mousse.
(Ryan Garcia, Austin, TX)
Weasley twins actually expelled for posting cheat sheets on their
MySpace pages.
(Ryan Garcia, Austin, TX)