NOTE FROM DAVE:

Sometimes the characters just don’t say what we
want them to say. Here’s our own dialogue.

The Top 10 Lines We’d
Like to Hear in “Star Trek”

10> “Yeah, I would’ve thought being lost on the far side of the galaxy without any aid or backup would’ve been a lot more exciting, too. Go figure.”

9> “Open your OWN damn hailing frequencies!”

8> “Mister Spock, please stop practicing your Vulcan Nerve Pinch on Uhura’s perky buttocks.”

7> “Captain, the tricorder is picking up signs of thinly-veiled social commentary.”

6> “Why, no, Counselor, my visor *can’t* see through a StarFleet uniform. Really. I swear.”

5> “Shore leave by the beach? Time to get the tribble trimmed.”

4> “Captain, Wesley’s perverted little teenage mind is overpowering any emotions I might be able to feel from our foes. Could you please ask him to stop staring at me?”

3> “We Vulcans were taught how to shun emotion by our great teacher, Al Gore.”

2> “Seven of Nine, your new assignment will be, um, whatever is supposed to be done at that station over there, directly under the cold air vent.”

and the Number 1 Line We’d Like to Hear in “Star Trek”…

1> “Captain, I’ve upgraded the ship’s power source to dilithium crystal meth. She’ll go twice as fast but only if you wear a purple feathered hat with a faux leopard skin trench coat and beat her twice a week.”

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Credits:

Selected from 55 submissions from 13 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

James Knowles, Bellingham, WA — 1, 8
Peter Casper, Brisbane, Australia — 2
Brad Wilkerson, El Sobrante, CA — 3, 5, 6 (Hat trick!)
Steve Thomas, Atlanta, GA — 4
Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL — 7
Geoff Brown, Ann Arbor, MI — 9
Jennifer A. Ford, Fort Wayne, IN — 10
Mary Ann McDonald, Sacramento, CA — Runner Up list name
Dave Oberhart, Durham, NC — Jedi Knight