The Top 9 Klingon Lullabies

9> Throw That Dishonorable Baby P’taK From the Tree, Cradle and All, It Has No Place in Stovokor!

8> The Itsy Bitsy Spider (Kills Creatures Many Times Its Size)

7> Now I lay me down to sleep At my side my weapon I keep If intruders come before I wake Their heads as trophies I will take

6> No singing is needed for Klingons to fall asleep, just a sharp blow to the back of the neck each night does the trick.

5> Die for Your Honor, and You’ll Sleep Well Forever

4> “Be a Klingon, do not quibble, Eat your little wee pet tribble!”

3> “Pray to bleed as the ancestors bled, Then crush your dolly’s little head. Don’t be like the human chimps, Don’t grow up to be a wimp.”

2> “Little one, finally, go to bed. In the morning, may you have no smooth head.”

and the Number 1 Klingon Lullaby…

1> Three blind targs, three blind targs, See how they run, see how they run. They all ran after the warrior’s wife, She cut off their heads with her father’s knife, But the targs were blind, and not worthy opponents, So the warrior slew his woman for bringing dishonor upon both houses.

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Credits:

Selected from 21 submissions from 7 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:

Chris Woodall, Dayton, KY — 1
G. Griebenow, Johannesburg, S. Africa — 2
Guy Payne, Birmingham, AL — 3, 4
Laura Oberst, Columbus, OH — 5
Doug Crews, Oceanside, CA — 6, 7, 8 (Hat trick!)
Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL — 9
Larry Hollister, Concord, CA — Topic
Dave Oberhart, Durham, NC — SF List Moderator