March 16, 2012     

NOTE FROM DAVE:

Top5 Science Fiction, along with the other Little
Fivers lists, will be taking an extended hiatus
for a few months to regroup and find new ways
of getting our weekly topical humor to you.

Today will be our last list for a while.

The Top 9 Things to Do While Lost in Space

9> Sweep up the asteroid belt to bulk Pluto back up to its proper
status as a planet.

8> Cry and whimper, same as any other day.

7> Play chicken in the airlock.

6> Polish the robot. (NO, you pervert, that is NOT a metaphor!)

5> Go back and fish my keys out of that black hole.

4> To hell with the Prime Directive – I’m stopping to ask for
directions.

3> Recalibrate the tachyon field in the subspace emitter by
utilizing a phased pulse ion generator (Starfleet engineers
only)

2> Ahh… porn, sweet porn

and the Number 1 Thing to Do While Lost in Space…

1> Treat boredom and depression by eating freeze-dried ice cream
by the kilogram.

.

Credits:

Selected from 39 submissions from 10 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:

Tracy Lunquist, DeLand, FL — 1, 6, 7 (Hat trick!)
Jerry Lane, Buffalo, NY — 2
Donald Johnson, Cincinnati, OH — 3
Dan Thompson, Austin, TX — 4, 5, 9 (Hat trick!)
Doug Crews, Oceanside, CA — 8
Dave Oberhart, Durham, NC — SF List Moderator