April 18, 2001      Share

Steve Hurd here, Top5 Relationships’ Judge Judy.
The main Top5 list just ran a list about
the worst things to say at your trial…
so we at Top5 Relationships answer with:

The Top 7 Things Not to
Say to the Divorce Judge

7> “So what if she caught me wearing her clothes? What would
you know…you go to work in a black dress!”

6> “It’s her own fault… if she hadn’t come home from work
early, she never would have caught me in bed with our
teenage neighbor.

5> “Every since he graduated from law school, he’s been such
an arrogant bastard!”

4> “Yes, I signed the prenuptial agreement. But I signed under
duress! He threatened not to marry me if I didn’t sign!”

3> “According to President Clinton, I never actually had sex
with her best friend. Or her sister. Or that hooker.
Or even the pool boy, Raoul!”

2> “Intolerable cruelty? But I thought he *liked* electrocution!”

and the Number 1 Thing Not to Say to the Divorce Judge…
1> “Would you like to live in a loveless, perverted, one-sided,
violent faithless marriage? Well, it turns out that neither
would she!”



Selected from 39 submissions from 13 contributors.
Today Top5 List authors are:

Michael Cunningham, Woodridge, IL — 1 (Woo-hoo 1st #1)
Kate Melnyk, Attleboro, MA — 2
Esteban Schwartz, Walnut Creek, CA — 3
Julie Nusbaum, Hamilton, IN — 4
Dennis Koho, Keizer, OR — 5
Amanda Butler, Provo, UT — 6
Andrew Irwin, Christchurch, NZ — 7
James Knowles, Bellingham, WA — Topic
Steve Hurd, Oakland, CA — Judge, RU List Title