March 7, 2001     

NOTE FROM STEVE:

Hi, I’m Steve Hurd, Top5 Relationships’ “Doctor of Love.”
Welcome to the Top5 Relationships list, where we’ll be
exploring the trials and tribulations of Relationships
and the Single Life. I’m not a licensed professional,
so please consult your own therapist, parole officer, minister,
tax advisor, attorney, sponsor and/or agent before taking any
action based upon the information contained in these lists.
Now, without further ado… the inaugural Relationships list!

The Top 7 Signs That a Fight With
Your Significant Other is Imminent

7> While walking into the Jerry Springer studios you begin to
wonder if your “birthday surprise” has anything to do with
that little “incident” with her sister.

6> The kitchen is roped off. And is that Don King talking to
your wife?

5> You: Just gave up lying for Lent.
She: Just asked, “Do I look fat in these jeans?”

4> “What? I thought *you* had the keys to the handcuffs!”

3> You turn on the Weather Channel to hear, “A massive cold
front is approaching the living room, heading northeasterly
from the kitchen!”

2> You forgot her birthday, but somehow remembered her twin
sister’s.

and the Number 1 Sign That a Fight With Your Significant Other is
Imminent…

1> You find her filling out an organ donor card… in YOUR name.

.

Credits:

Selected from 201 submissions from 69 contributors.
Today Top5 List authors are:

“SuzanPeachFuzz”, CO — 1 (Woo-hoo! 1st #1)
Vic Vitek, Hopewell Junction, NY — 2
Jeremiah Overton, Nesconset, NY — 3
Nancy Vaine, Fairfield, CT — 4
Julie Nusbaum, Hamilton, IN — 5
Cindy Jorgenson, Madison, AL — 6
Andrew Irwin, Christchurch, NZ — 7
Esteban Schwartz, Walnut Creek, CA — Topic, Runner Up list name
Steve Hurd, Oakland, CA — Presiding Judge