November 28, 2001      Share

Steve Hurd here, Top5 Relationships’ “Barbara Cartland”
Last week’s “Top 9 Worst Titles for Movies based on your Love
Life” had only 8 entries. The title for #9 should have read
“The Top 5 Moderator Who Was Always One Short.”

The Top 8 Lines You’ll
Never See in a Romance Novel

8> Trailing her fingers over his face, tracing his features,
Heather stared deeply into Lance’s eyes with an impish grin
on her face. With a pixie’s laugh she said, “Pull my finger.”

7> Every man she fell for was the same… violent, self-centered,
deceptive. But, it would be different this time. She had
finally met an honest professional – a member of the WWF!

6> While doing the Polka, Anna would dance up against his bulge,
then quickly dance away. Twenty minutes of this sensuous dance
was all the foreplay she needed.

5> She could still remember their night of passion 8 to 10 days
ago when strange red boils bloomed on her dewey petal.

4> His heart pounded as she slowly unbuttoned her sweater. His
desire was almost unbearable as she slowly let it fall. His
eyes grew wider as her left breast finally saw the light.
Then, a second later, her right. Finally, after what seemed
an eternity, her milky white center breast joined the party.

3> She was gorgeous, with silky blonde hair and exquisite blue
eyes, high, perky breasts, a stunning, narrow waist and flat
stomach that only served to draw his eyes toward the generous
curves of her hips which awakened his imagination and caused
his loins to stir. She leaned seductively over the Top 5

2> As their eyes locked over the smoldering ruins of the
Japanese city, he growled in passion as only a giant radio-
active lizard can.

and the Number 1 Line You’ll Never See in a Romance Novel…
1> He turned to her, and whispered gently into her ear, “That
wasn’t me, that was my invisible elephant.”



Selected from 39 submissions from 13 contributors.
Today Top5 List authors are:

Vic Vitek, Hopewell Junction, NY — 1 (4th #1)
James Knowles, Bellingham, WA — 2, Topic
Nancy Vaine, Fairfield, CT — 3, RU List Name
Joe Terranova, Lake Orion, MI — 4
Brent McDaniel, Atlanta, GA — 5
Victoria Capps, Pensacola, FL — 6
Julie Nusbaum, Hamilton, IN — 7
Dawson Rambo, Santa Rosa, CA — 8
Steve Hurd, Oakland, CA — Submissions Editor