June 30, 2009
without anybody noticing, but eventually
South Carolinians noticed that their
governor was gone. Gov. Mark Sanford had
apparently gone for, um, a long hike on
the Appalachian Trail without telling
anybody — including Mrs. Sanford.
So what would your favorite politician be
doing if he or she knew nobody was looking?
Politicians Are Really Doing
8> JFK: His sister-in-law, Ethel.
7> Dick Cheney: Tending the lake of boiling lava.
6> Newt Gingrich: Working on Contract on America 2.0.
5> Joseph McCarthy: Attending socials.
4> Larry Craig: Leg stretches. Wide, wide leg stretches.
3> Hillary Clinton: Sneaking a moment in the Oval Office chair
while Barack’s shooting hoops.
2> Rod Blagojevich: Cussin’ up a storm under the salon dryer.
Selected from 24 submissions from 7 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:
Larry Hollister, Concord, CA — 1, 2, 3 (Triplebuster!)
John English, Provo, UT — 4
Jim Phynn, Horsham, PA — 5, 8
Nancy Anton, Portland, ME — 6
Neil Chandler, Basking Ridge, NJ — 7
The Speaker, Washington, DC — The Speaker
(Jim Phynn, Horsham, PA)
Barney Frank: Working on his other Mel Blanc impressions,
now that he has Sylvester the Cat nailed.
(John English, Provo, UT)
Sarah Palin: Lipstick practice with her favorite pet, Porky.
(Bill Livingston, Decatur, AL)