February 14, 2011      Share

NOTE FROM THE LIST VET
2011 has been declared World Veterinary Year, marking the
250th anniversary of the birth of the veterinary profession
and of veterinary science. It was in 1761 that King Louis XV
of France, troubled by the ongoing scourge of cattle disease,
proposed that a veterinary school should be founded in Lyon.
What was it like in those early days?

The Top 8 Things Overheard
in an 18th-Century Vet’s Office

8> “I know not how to make this plainer. The steed would fair
better should you tether the cart behind him.”

7> “Prithee remove thine hound’s snout from out my codpiece.”

6> “Bathe him thrice a week to eliminate that foul odor– oh,
sorry. That’s you.”

5> “Marian, oxen cleanup, Exam Room 2.”

4> “Attach two leeches and messenger me in the morn.”

3> “It turns out the problem is that the dog is your familiar.
He’ll be okay, but I’m afraid you’ll have to be burned at the
stake. Take him away, boys.”

2> “Your wolfhound seems a bit malnourished. Increase his diet to
three peasants a day.”

and the Number 1 Thing Overheard in an 18th-Century Vet’s Office…
1> “Sir, I do not believe this is a problem with the flock, but
perhaps with your lonely herders.”


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Credits:

Selected from 23 submissions from 10 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:

Trish Jensen, Reedsville, PA — 1, 4, 8 (Purr-fecta!/4th #1)
James Knowles, Bellingham, WA — 2
Mark Weiss, Austin, TX — 3
Emily Fortner, Huntsville, AL — 4
Dave Ferry, Purvis, MS — 4
Leslie Arduser-Brogan, Webster, NY — 5
Melanie Stephens, Manassas, VA — 6
Julie Nusbaum, Hamilton, IN — 7
Sandra Hull, Arlington, VA — List Vet

RUNNERS UP list — Stool Samples

“All done. Please leave three eggs and a cabbage with the
receptionist.”
     (Julie Nusbaum, Hamilton, IN)
     (Mark Weiss, Austin, TX)

“Cats from Siam and dogs from Labrador? They’ll never be popular.”
     (James Knowles, Bellingham, WA)

“Sorry, your dog has died but he was delicious.”
     (Dave Ferry, Purvis, MS)

“The treatment is complete. You can put your ox back in his
carrier now.”
     (Melanie Stephens, Manassas, VA)

“This stone tablet inscribed with your cat’s name and the name of
your village will help locate him if he goes astray. It’s called a
macrochip.”
     (Melanie Stephens, Manassas, VA)

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