August 31, 2005     

The Top 5 Ways to Annoy Your Maestro

5> Marry her. That seemed to annoy the crap out of my wife.

4> Take your fellow oboe players and start a rumble with the
pansy French horns.

3> Step 1: Replace his baton with a magician’s wand.
Step 2: Sit back and laugh as rabbits pop out of the tubas.

2> Smugly mimick his every move with your drumsticks. You’ve
got twice as many sticks as he does.

and the Number 1 Way to Annoy Your Maestro…

1> “Hey! I rememember this song from a Looney Tune!”

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Credits:

Selected from 35 submissions from 13 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:

Rabbi Crut, Bowling Green, OH — 1, 3 (13th #1)
G. Griebenow, Johannesburg, S. Africa — 2
Bill Livingston, Decatur, AL — 3
Curtis Stoddard, Milwaukie, OR — 4
Dustin Moskowitz, Skillman, NJ — 5
Eric Landrieu, Burlington, NJ — Topic
Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL — Banner tag
Matt Kall, Cleveland Heights, OH — Backup Singer