September 26, 2007     

Funning With the Devil.

NOTE FROM ANDY:

Van Halen is hitting the road for a reunion tour
with most of the the original lineup… *with*
David Lee Roth, but *without* original bassist
Michael Anthony. Instead, Eddie Van Halen’s son,
Wolfgang, will be playing bass for the band.
What’s on Michael Anthony’s to-do list, aside from
touring in a band that’s not quite Van Halen?

The Top 6 Things on
Michael Anthony’s To-Do List

6> Mas tequila!

5> Thank the good lord that you’re not a washed-up has-been, like
Gary Cherone.

4> Practice being “Cabo” to Sammy’s “Wabo.”

3> Weep quietly in the corner because you were replaced by a
fifteen-year-old.

2> Get an enema! Enema-a! Enema! Enema-a-a-a-a-a-a! Enema!

and the Number 1 Thing on Michael Anthony’s To-Do List…

1> Valerie Bertinelli

.

Credits:

Selected from 16 submissions from 6 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:

Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL — 1 (27th #1! How highly improbable!)
Jim G. Phynn, Horsham, PA — 2
Mike Davis, San Antonio, TX — 3, 4
Andy Grosser, Somerville, MA — 5, Maestro, Topic
Dave Ferry, Purvis, MS — 6
Amy Lane, Waterboro, ME — Banner tag

RUNNERS UP list — Fright Now

Enroll in that macrame class, ‘cuz that’s bound to make a comeback
too.

(Andy Grosser, Somerville, MA)

Issue a press release denying he’s married to J-Lo.

(Jim G. Phynn, Horsham, PA)

Last minute entry into the GOP Primary race.

(Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL)

Score some blow, check out the groupies… pretty much the same as
the last thirty years.

(Mike Davis, San Antonio, TX)