October 17, 2001     

NOTE FROM JEFF:

Last month, Liverpool city planners gave the green light
for construction of the “Hard Day’s Night Hotel.” Standing
next to a faithful recreation of the Cavern Club, this
Beatles-themed hotel will feature guest-rooms decorated with
murals and decor based on Fab Four songs, movies, and events.
(Do you suppose there’ll be a bed in the
“Norwegian Wood” suite, or just a bathtub?)

The Top 10 Signs You’re
Staying in a Rock-and-Roll Hotel

10> “Welcome, gentlemen, would you like trashed or non-trashed?”

9> Sign above the front desk states: “You Can Check Out Any Time
You Like, But You Can Never Leave.”

8> The room service menu includes Jack Daniel’s, green M&Ms,
groupie sandwiches, and bat heads.

7> The Keith Richards Suite has a blood-alcohol-level access key
system.

6> In the bathroom, you’ll find a complimentary groupie,
sanitized for your convenience.

5> The towels in the Ricky Martin Suite are “His” and “?”.

4> “Welcome to Brian Wilson Extended Stay Sandbox Suites!”

3> Patrons call the management to complain about the loud music
from the room next door — because it’s horribly derivative.

2> “This cocaine has been placed by Gideons International.”

and the Number 1 Sign You’re Staying in a Rock-and-Roll Hotel…

1> The bellboy looks like the lead singer of Dexy’s Midnight
Runners… because he WAS the lead singer of Dexy’s Midnight
Runners.

.

Credits:

Selected from 55 submissions from 20 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

Joseph Prisco, Ithaca, NY — 1, 5 (1st #1! Rookie!)
Andy Grosser, Boston, MA — 2, 7
Will Middelaer, New Britain, CT — 3, RU list name
Matt Kall, Cleveland Heights, OH — 4
Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL — 6, 9
Jeff Conner, San Jose, CA — 8
Jeff Scherer, Brooklyn, NY — 8
Allan Rousselle, Redmond, WA — 9
Jonathan P. Bernick, Conway, SC — 10
Whit Watson, West Hartford, CT — 10
Spike Jones, Atlanta, GA — Topic
Nancy Vaine, Fairfield, CT — Banner Tag
Jeffrey Anbinder, New York, NY — Maestro