May 16, 2001     

The Top 9 Signs You’re
Dating an Opera Singer

9> He says he’s not a famous Sumo wrestler, and yet people are
constantly asking for his autograph.

8> She calls getting on top “the ride of the Valkyrie.”

7> He eats pasta eight times a day, and appears to color his
hair and eyebrows with a black Sharpie.

6> Spear? Check.
Magic helmet? Check.
D&D dice? Nowhere to be found.

5> “Yes, I’m sure the other eight people for our table-for-ten
will be here soon; now shut up and refill the bread basket!”

4> By the time she’s done with “Happy Birthday To You,” the
candles are out and all the dogs in the neighborhood are
going nuts.

3> This is the fifth time she’s got consumption this month.

2> “What do you mean you’re done? Did you hear me sing?”

and the Number 1 Sign You’re Dating an Opera Singer…

1> Neighbors start to complain that you never should have
dumped that nice, quiet drummer that you used to date.

.

Credits:

Selected from 33 submissions from 12 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

Terry Mingle, Cortland, NY — 1 (1st #1!)
Brian M. Klesc, Joliet, IL — 2
Jeff Scherer, Brooklyn, NY — 3, 7
Larry Hollister, Concord, CA — 4
Colin Ritchie, San Diego, CA — 5, 9 (Rookie!)
Wade Kwon, Birmingham, AL — 6
Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL — 8
Bill Martin, Los Angeles, CA — Topic
Matt Kall, Cleveland Heights, OH — Banner Tag
Dave Berman, San Francisco, CA — RU list name
Jeffrey Anbinder, New York, NY — Maestro