February 13, 2002     

NOTE FROM JEFF:

In honor of St. Valentine’s Day…

The Top 6 Signs You’re
Dating a Classical Composer

6> You just can’t resist his overtures.

5> All his love-making techniques are variations on a theme.

4> Refers to his private parts as “the horn section.”

3> During sex, he’s always throwing you off by changing the time
signature.

2> He keeps asking if you’d like to be first chair in his wood
section.

and the Number 1 Signs You’re Dating a Classical Composer…

1> Keeps talking about his movements, but you know he’s not old
enough to need Metamucil.

.

Credits:

Selected from 15 submissions from 6 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

Thea VanHalsema, Grand Rapids, MI — 1 (2nd #1!)
Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL — 2, 5
Larry Hollister, Concord, CA — 3
Whit Watson, West Hartford, CT — 4
Fran Fruit, Winnetka, IL — 6
Bill Martin, Los Angeles, CA — Topic, RU list name
Dave Berman, San Francisco, CA — Banner Tag
Jeffrey Anbinder, New York, NY — Maestro