Previous list: 
May 31, 2006
hiatus. We were experiencing technical
difficulties. Luckily, we finally made bail.
The Top 9 Signs Your
Favorite Band/Artist Has Sold Out
9> Groupies are now required to watch a Trojans commercial before
being allowed on the bus.
8> Her latest album cover features a photo of her exposed right
breast with the message, “As seen on TV!”
7> He’s now “The Artist Formally Sponsored by Nike.”
6> “… baby, we were born to run! But not Patti’s panty ho
from Victoria’s Secret.”
5> Pearl Jams and Jellies: now an important part of your
nutritious breakfast.
4> Upcoming release on Island Records: “Hot and Moist,” by
Cinnabon Jovi.
3> New from Mattel — it’s Barbie’s New Pal, Pink!
2> “U2Yahoo! Because You Still Haven’t Found What You’re Looking
For.”
Coulter.
Selected from 64 submissions from 18 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:
Larry Hollister, Concord, CA — 1 (14th #1!)
Bill Livingston, Decatur, AL — 2, 3
Brian Bell, Seattle, WA — 4, 5
Dave Ferry, Purvis, MS — 5
David Toth, Milwaukee, WI — 6, Banner tag
Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL — 7
Allan Rousselle, Redmond, WA — 8
Kate Melnyk, Tewksbury, MA — 9
Reid Kerr, Carthage, TX — Topic
Jeffrey Anbinder, New York, NY — Maestro
(Dave Ferry, Purvis, MS)
John Madden has been replaced as the spokesman for Ace Hardware by
Maynard from Tool.
(Brian Bell, Seattle, WA)
For the encore, lead singer screams, “You want something that
totally rocks?!? We just saved a ton of money on our car
insurance! Goodnight all!”
(David Toth, Milwaukee, WI)
The liner notes thank Budweiser for “creative input” on all songs.
(Kate Melnyk, Tewksbury, MA)
I never really imagined Tori Amos’s “Me and a Gun” being used to
hawk Smith & Wesson.
(Jim G. Phynn, Horsham, PA)
“And on the drums, from Davenport Iowa… put your hands together
for Sony Music Executive Vice President and Chief Financial
Officer Kevin Kelleher!!!”
(Pete Marinucci, Astoria, NY)
“The answer, my friend, is searchable on Yahoo,
The answer is searchable on Yahoo.”
(Slick Sharkey, Miami, FL)
“The Limp Bizkit/*NSync Comedy Hour.”
(Guy Payne, Leeds, AL)
Runners Up list name
(Bill Livingston, Decatur, AL)