September 5th, 2008



The Top 7 Things You Can Do
When the Movie Is Boring
(Part II)


7> Polish that Paul Reubens impression you’ve been working on since losing your girlfriend.

6> Figure out how many times each actress has been in a movie where she’s shown her boobies.

5> Write superior fanfic version of film on your ticket stub.

4> Make a list of all the things you could have bought with the money you paid for tickets, sodas, popcorn, candy, parking and babysitter.

3> Calculate the price per kernel for the Mega-Jumbo bucket.

2> Change your seat every two minutes and ask others if they’ve seen the leopard-print underwear you misplaced last week.

and the Number 1 Thing You Can Do When the Movie Is Boring…

1> Sue the producer for violation of the Geneva Convention’s torture statute.




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Credits:

Selected from 44 submissions from 13 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:

Jim G. Phynn, Horsham, PA — 1
Scott Witmer, Hanover, PA — 2, 7
Brandon Hunt, Portsmouth, RI — 3, 4
Jennifer Ford, Chicago, IL — 5
Jill Gallagher, Seattle, WA — 6
Kristian Idol, Burbank, CA — Trying to keep eyes open