The Top 9 Signs You’re
Too Stupid to Watch Movies

9> “Hey, look, free candy and popcorn on the floor!”

8> You can’t figure out why your remote won’t work on the sixty-foot TV.

7> You keep trying to look up Jessica Rabbit’s dress.

6> After the first preview, you get up and leave, complaining about the shortness of movies these days.

5> You can’t understand why someone hasn’t had Dennis Hopper committed.

4> You watch the video again and again in the hope that Old Yeller just might make it this time.

3> You sit facing the audience, and every few minutes you turn towards the screen to “shushh!” the actors.

2> Whenever the movie gets exciting, you choke on a pretzel.

and the Number 1 Sign You’re Too Stupid to Watch Movies…

1> You bring a portable DVD player so you can watch the movie that *you* want to watch.

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Credits:

Selected from 33 submissions from 10 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

Jill Gallagher, Seattle, WA — 1, 6, 9 (3 pic deal! 4th #1)
Bruce Alter, Fairfax Station, VA — 2, 7
Kim Moser, New York, NY — 3, Topic
Scott Witmer, Hanover, PA — 4
Danny Gallagher, Henderson, TX — 5
Jeff Rabinowitz, Wilkes-Barre, PA — 8
Brandon Hunt, Braintree, MA — 9
Scott Bostick, Lake Ridge, VA — Banner tag
Kristian Idol, Burbank, CA — List “Ed” Itar