The Top 7 Repercussions If
Spider-Man Were Overweight

7> Breaks up with Mary Jane, starts dating Kirstie Alley.

6> Easily foiled by archvillain Dr. Munchies.

5> “Hey, spiders have to eat as much as they weigh every day, you know!”

4> Removes horizontal stripes from costume.

3> Has to pay extra for titanium-reinforced web solution.

2> Villains not intimidated when they see “pregnant-woman bellybutton” poking out from underneath costume.

and the Number 1 Repercussion If Spider-Man Were Overweight…

1> Manhattan ER doctors get really good at popping Spidey-arms back into Spidey-sockets.

.

Credits:

Selected from 15 submissions from 4 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

Jennifer Ford, Ft. Wayne, IN — 1, 5 (5th #1)
John English, Orem, UT — 2, 6
Brandon Hunt, Braintree, MA — 3, 4, 7 (Three-picture deal!)
Larry Hollister, Concord, CA — 7
Kristian Idol, Burbank, CA — Carbo-loaded