NOTE FROM KRISTIAN:

Mary-Kate Olsen is moving out of the New York
apartment she shares with her sister, Ashley.

The Top 9 Reasons the
Olsen Twins Are Separating

9> Two of the most amazing stereos money can buy… one playing Kenny G, the other playing Iggy Pop.

8> Now that Ashley’s ballooned to 95 pounds, she’s just too fat to share a bathroom.

7> The critical mass of cuteness is sucking all the oxygen out of their penthouse loft.

6> Ashley prefers no carbs, Mary-Kate prefers no food.

5> Oh, I dunno… maybe because THEY’RE BILLIONAIRES and don’t need to split the rent?

4> They just can’t seem to compromise between “toilet seat down” and “toilet seat down and covered with vomit spatter.”

3> Now that she’s legal, M-K wants to take her relationship with Uncle Jesse to “the next level.”

2> The guys they bring over always have the same totally gross suggestion.

and the Number 1 Reason the Olsen Twins Are Separating…

1> Because they know I can’t be in two places at once, the little vixens!

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Credits:

Selected from 33 submissions from 11 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

Chris White, Los Angeles, CA — 1 (2nd #1)
Larry Hollister, Concord, CA — 2, 4, 9 (Three-picture deal!)
Danny Gallagher, Henderson, TX — 2
Beth Kujawski, Crown Point, IN — 3, 5, 7 (Three-picture deal!)
Bruce Alter, Fairfax Station, VA — 3, 8
Rabbi Crut, Bowling Green, OH — 3
Ken Woo, Encinitas, CA — 4
Kate Melnyk, Tewksbury, MA — 6
Kristian Idol, Burbank, CA — The Good-Looking One