NOTE FROM KRISTIAN:

‘Nuff said.

The Top 9 Differences if
Movies Were Made by Microsoft

9> Spiderman battles the evil Netscapian.

8> A little microphone-guy keeps appearing in the corner of the screen, offering to explain the plot.

7> Anthony Michael Hall and Charles Martin Smith join the $25 Million Club.

6> You only want to see an Adam Sandler comedy, but it comes bundled with a documentary on plankton, a nudist western, three Ronald Reagan movies and a musical starring cows.

5> If a film opens on more than 99 screens, it crashes.

4> There’s lots of exciting hype and advertising, but the movie is never as impressive as the previews make it out to be. Wait a minute… differences?

3> Sure, Microsoft makes the big blockbusters, but the indie flicks by Linux are better.

2> If the movie breaks — which it will at its most critical moment — the screen goes blue and everyone has to watch it again from the beginning.

and the Number 1 Difference if Movies Were Made by Microsoft…

1> The film is in the “new standard” 35.4mm format, but the projectors still only show 35.

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Credits:

Selected from 22 submissions from 6 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

William C. Martell, Screenwriter — 1, 5, 6, 7, 9 (9th #1, Flush!)
Marko Peric, Civilian — 2, 3, 4 (Hat trick!)
Kenn McCracken, Comics Editor — 2, 7
Wade Kwon, Civilian — 2
Beth Kujawski, Voice Talent — 7
Jeff Scherer, Art Director — 8
Kristian Idol, Director/Mac Nut — Moderator