January 13th, 2006
The Top 9 Awards We’d Like to See for 2005
9> Truth in Advertising Award: To “The Brothers Grimm” and “Doom” for predicting their own reviews
8> Comeback, Go Back Award: To Jane Fonda for “Monster-in-Law”
7> Weakest Link Award: For Katie Holmes in “Batman Begins”
6> Being and Nothingness Award: To Paris Hilton
5> Free at Last, Free at Last, Thank God Almighty, Free at Last Award: To George Lucas for “Star Wars, Episode III: Revenge of the Sith”
4> Catwoman Award, given to the latest Best Actress winner to make a crappy commercial flick: Charlize Theron for “Aeon Flux”
3> Everybody’s Got a Mortgage Award: Presented to both Steve Martin and Eugene Levy for “Cheaper by the Dozen 2″
2> How Low Can You Go? Award: To Uwe Boll, whose body of work is making Ed Wood look like Stanley Kubrick
and the Number 1 Award We’d Like to See for 2005…
1> The Right Place at the Right Time Award: To Vince Vaughn, for snatching up Jennifer Aniston
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Credits:
Selected from 29 submissions from 10 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:
Dave Ferry, Purvis, MS — 1
John English, Orem, UT — 2, 7
Jeff Rabinowitz, Wilkes-Barre, PA — 3
Ryan Garcia, Austin, TX — 4
Bruce Alter, Fairfax Station, VA — 5, 8
Judith Cotrill, Bronx, NY — 6
Scott Witmer, Hanover, PA — 9
Brandon Hunt, Braintree, MA — Topic
Kristian Idol, Burbank, CA — Birthday Boy
