Previous list: 
March 12, 2011
a decade of squabbling, illegalities, subterfuge, and
international rivalry — Boeing finally won (again) the $30B
USAF contract for much-needed new refueling aircraft.
Those two things seem to go together, like oil and pink ink.
9> And what happened then? Well in Everett, they say,
The economy there grew three sizes that day.
8> In the Air Force, a tanker is long overdue.
What’s next is replacing the B-52.
7> We reopened the bids. Did we see something new?
Same things. Let’s just call them Plane One and Plane Two.
These planes will not slight you, but one you must choose;
And whichever you pick, the taxpayers lose.
6> The lowest-priced bid made the generals all nervous.
“It’s up in the air! It should *not* be self-service!”
5> If Washington-built, how the cages will rattle;
Unless it’s the one that’s around old Seattle.
4> “This plane will fly high, very high in the clouds,
Or my name isn’t Randy McDandy McDowdz!
When our gas-boom comes down from our gas-tanky-door,
Your jets will get plugged like a two-dollar whore.”
3> In Snohomish, they heard a big cry and loud clamor,
Since making that bird won’t be happ’ning in Bammer.
2> It came with new rivets. It came with new tags.
It came with the right red and white and blue flags.
They’re cheaters! They’re swindlers! They’re snoopers and spies!
You don’t want Ferraris, or Wagens from Volks.
So buy them from Boeing, we just-plain-plane folks.”
Selected from 18 submissions from 6 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:
Larry Hollister, Concord, CA — 1, 4, 6 (3-day pass!/10th #1)
Kevin Dopart, Washington, DC — 2, 3, 7, 9 (4-day pass!)
Marty McCullen, Gettysburg, PA — 5
Jeffrey Contompasis, Ashburn, VA — 8, Banner tag
Colonel Howie, The Pentagon, VA — Topic
Kilroy, Washington, DC — Graffitist