March 15, 2012
is going AWOL for an indeterminate amount of time.
If it’s something you’ll miss, please drop old
Kilroy a note. Thanks for being a reader (or
a listener, if you’re a Marine) over the years.
And our last list — at least for a while — is about
something that will definitely be missed: the S9, the
standard issue, brown, military glasses frames (so
spectacularly ugly that they’re more often called
“Birth Control Glasses,” as if no one could ever
attract a sexual partner while wearing them).
The specs are being replaced by hipper, more rectangular
black frames called the 5A. But like other military
traditions, in some strange way, they’ll be missed.
the Military Birth Control Glasses
5> You won’t be able to keep conning that blonde at the club who
actually thinks they *are* a contraceptive.
4> After leaving the service, they went so well with that job as
a coffee barista.
3> Snipers will have a much harder time achieving that Elvis
Costello presence where “My Aim Is True.”
2> You can’t whip them off dramatically anymore to do your Clark
Kent-to-Superman impression.
Selected from 13 submissions from 4 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:
Jeffrey Contompasis, Ashburn, VA — 1, 2, 4 (3-day pass!/14th #1!)
Kevin Dopart, Washington, DC — 3
Dave Ferry, Purvis, MS — 5
Colonel Howie, The Pentagon, VA — Banner tag
Kilroy, Washington, DC — Graffitist