July 17, 2008     

To be pleased with one’s limits is a wretched state.

NOTE FROM KIM:

There comes a time when every nurse
considers leaving floor nursing and its
day-after-day patient contact. Some opt
for administration, some opt for
pharmaceutical sales, and some end up
coding paperwork rather than patients.
But our favorite movie RN, the
tyrannical, insidiously evil Nurse
Ratched, opted for Human Resources.

The Top 7 Changes Now That
Nurse Ratched Runs Human Resources

7> That nursing assistant you hate? She’s now assigned to you.
For. Every. Bloody. Shift.

6> Point out that you have not had a raise in three years, and
expect to lose that digit.

5> “Casual Friday” attire now includes armbands and jackboots.
*You’re* not included.

4> The Engineering Department has installed a trap door into the
electro-therapy room right outside HR.

3> Making changes to your coverage truly does require a pound of
flesh.

2> Lunch breaks are now limited to catching whatever food the
patients throw at you.

and the Number 1 Change Now That Nurse Ratched Runs Human Resources…

1> She still refuses to bring George Clooney back to the ER.

.

Credits:

Selected from 23 submissions from 9 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:

Larry Mills, Keeseville, NY — 1, Topic
Leonard Topolski, Pearland, TX — 2, 3, 6 (Hat trick!)
Randy Lee, Burke, VA — 4
Melony Lamusk RN, Crenshaw, WI — 5, Banner tag
Michele Lord, Lincoln, NE — 5, 7
Kim Walker-Daniels RN/NWA, Madison, WI — Wretched Nurse

RUNNERS UP list — McMurphy’s Law

If one more candystriper porn video shows up in her mailbox,
somebody is getting a craniotomy.
     (Larry Mills, Keeseville, NY)

Taking temperatures orally is now against policy.
     (Larry Mills, Keeseville, NY)

Runners Up list name
     (Randy Lee, Burke, VA)