The Top 7 Signs
You’re an Internet Newbie

7> How can I slow down the monkey?

6> You feel smug when your computer announces “You’ve Got Mail!” since you know it’s Sunday.

5> Your 2nd follow-up to your original article begins: “FAQ? I don’t have TIME to read the FAQ! ANSWER MY QUESTION!”

4> Dear Mr. White, Why are there more than five items in your list? Love, Britney

3> Your most intelligent responses? :0 :-<

2> “Oh my God, that woman’s naked!”

and the Number 1 Sign You’re an Internet Newbie…

1> Your PC has more viruses than the 5th fleet on shore leave in Singapore.

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Credits:

Selected from 24 submissions from 4 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

Dave Goudsward, Harrisburg, PA — 1
Jeffrey Anbinder, New York, NY — 2, 4
Dawson Rambo, Santa Rosa, CA — 3, 5, 6 (Hat trick!)
Peter Casper, Brisbane, Australia — 7
Kim Moser, New York, NY — List moderator