NOTE FROM KIM:

Children all across America are returning
to school over the next few weeks.
Meanwhile, the school district of Columbus, OH has
announced plans to develop an online high school.

The Top 9 Features of
an Online High School

9> The cafeteria serves nothing but spam.

8> Bullies threaten to hack your computer unless you PayPal them your lunch money.

7> The first day of school is taken up mostly by queries of “a/s/l?”

6> Searching for porn now qualifies as health education homework.

5> Gym class consists of 50 reps of Counter Strike.

4> The video of the senior prom is replaced with a porn site link, allowing the geeks to participate for the first time.

3> By being connected to other schools across the world, students are no longer limited to cheating off other classmates.

2> Every 45 minutes you have to stick your computer in a backpack and walk around the block.

and the Number 1 Feature of an Online High School…

1> EnglshT33chr> d00dz, hand in ur paperz b4 Friday. l8r

.

Credits:

Selected from 56 submissions from 19 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

Geoff Brown, Ann Arbor, MI — 1, 7
Chuck Burke, Phoenix, NY — 2
Matt Van Opens, Kenosha, WI — 3
Larry Mills, Oneonta, NY — 4
Brett W. Campbell, Rochelle, IL — 5
Dave Goudsward, Boynton Beach, FL — 6
Brandon Hunt, Braintree, MA — 6, Topic
Matt Hurlburt, Stow, OH — 6
Daniel Attema, Adelaide, Australia — 8
Bruce W. Alter, Fairfax Station, VA — 9
Kim Moser, New York, NY — List Moderator