The Top 9 Benefits of
Internet-Enabled Household Appliances
(Part I)

9> Search engines never have trouble finding your Metamaytag dishwasher.

8> Miraculously the refrigerator keeps dispensing free spam.

7> eLaundry Center connects not only to eWasher and eDryer, but to backups eWashboard, eClothesline and eLaundromat.

6> Your alarm clock just uploaded movies of your latest conquest to YouTube.

5> Washer/dryer combo automatically launders Nigerian currency.

4> Now you can blame that burned pizza on hackers.

3> The toilet will email you photos proving who left the seat up.

2> Solving every family’s most vexing problem, encrypted refrigerator virtualization allows everyone to access only their own food.

and the Number 1 Benefit of Internet-Enabled Household Appliances…

1> Now you can surf for porn while vacuuming, but not the way you’re thinking.

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Credits:

Selected from 46 submissions from 16 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:

Dan Horton, Fishkill, NY — 1
Matt Van Opens, Janesville, WI — 2, 4
Chris Pulliam, San Dimas, CA — 3
John Schmidt, Dayton, OH — 5
Pete Van Opens, Okauchee, WI — 6
Bill Livingston, Decatur, AL — 7
John O’Byrne, Dublin, Ireland — 8
Bruce W. Alter, Fairfax Station, VA — 9
Douglas Frank, Crosby, TX — Topic
Kim Moser, New York, NY — List Moderator