Previous list: 
February 17, 2009
Stephen King dissed Stephanie Meyer and her
“Twilight” books. Well, the horror world sort
of snickered, but the outrage was palpable
among both teenage girls who read USA Today.
Among the highlights are “She’s not very
good” and “The real difference is that Jo
Rowling is a terrific writer and
Stephenie Meyer can’t write worth a darn.”
OMG, I sense an approaching wave of the
drama that only a distraught mob of
teenager fangirls can generate!
Doesn’t Like About “Twilight”
9> If he wanted to be trapped in a theater-filled with shrieking
teenage girls, he’s have gone to a Hannah Montana concert.
8> Wild teen parties are depicted are as decapitation-free, and
where’s the fun in that?
7> Remove the adjectives conveying how gorgeous Edward is, and
suddenly Meyer is a short story writer.
6> Anyone as advanced in years as this vampire fella should have
at least, oh, 5 or 6 divorces. And wear suspenders. (Oops,
sorry, those are things *Larry* King doesn’t like about
Twilight.)
5> As any idiot knows, teenage angst manifests itself in
psychopathic killing sprees, not dating anxiety.
4> Kristen Stewart can do sooooo much better than Robert
Pattinson.
3> Werewolves eat people. They do not stress over who to take to
the prom.
2> An entire movie about vampires and werewolves and not a single
film credit for Tom Savini? Blasphemy!
love. And then, no one eats it!
Selected from 36 submissions from 12 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:
Mark D. Sabien, What Cheer, IA — 1, 8 (15th #1!)
Scott T. Goudsward, Haverhill, MA — 2, 9
Douglas Drawsen, Pentucket, MA — 3, 4
James Knowles, Bellingham, WA — 5
Larry Hollister, Concord, CA — 6, 7
Dave Goudsward, Lake Worth, FL — Zombie Master