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December 4, 2008      Share

I just read an article talking about how
Chicago could get a new school for
victims of bullying. Cool idea, right?
Sure, but boring. And why should the
victims be shuffled away? How about we
send all the bullies to their own school?

The Top 7 Signs You’re
at a School for Bullies

7> Detention involves underwear and a flag pole.

6> The Spelling Bee turns into a free-for-all after the first
misspelling of “cat.”

5> Freshman Mixer? More like West Side Story.

4> No urinals in the boys’ bathrooms, so there are more regular
toilets for swirlies.

3> Twelve Angry Men, and they’re just the hall pass guys.

2> Each teacher has a personal body guard.

and the Number 1 Sign You’re at a School for Bullies…
1> Local economy very fluid as lunch money circulates all day



Selected from 38 submissions from 11 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:

Steven Lunetta, Tucson, AZ — 1 (4th #1!)
Lance Petry, Shandong Province, China — 2
Trish Jensen, Reedsville, PA — 3, 7, Banner tag
Vic Vitek, Hopewell Junction, NY — 4
Scott Elmer, Wheaton, IL — 5
Guy Reeves, Houston, TX — 6
Barb McMullen, Ann Arbor, MI — Hall Monitor

RUNNERS UP list — Bad Apples

10 years straight winning the state rugby title.
     (Scott Elmer, Wheaton, IL)

Detention is “After school, in the parking lot. Come alone.”
     (Jay Shuck, Minneapolis, MN)

Everyone walks funny due to permanent wedgies.
     (Judith Cottrill, Bronx, NY)
     (Steven Lunetta, Tucson, AZ)

Gym class is 10% athletics, 90% locker room.
     (Jay Shuck, Minneapolis, MN)

No metal detector, you’re just stripped searched as soon as you
walk in.
     (Guy Reeves, Houston, TX)

School song lyrics: Nyah nyah nyah.
     (Judith Cottrill, Bronx, NY)

The janitor’s locked into his own supply closet.
     (Guy Reeves, Houston, TX)