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October 7, 2010      Share

My dentist gets to give me laughing gas
and stick his fingers in my mouth. What
don’t I want to know about him?

The Top 8 Things You Don’t
Want to Know About Your Dentist

8> Before he gives you those little packets of floss he likes to
lick them.

7> Look closely at his diploma: “Manchester School of British

6> She’s got a shrine to the Tooth Fairy piled high with
extracted teeth.

5> He spikes his laughing gas with Rohypnol, just to be sure.

4> The unpaid invoice for “used drill bits” from BP.

3> Her vibrator also makes that horrible tooth-drilling sound.

2> She and the last patient REALLY enjoyed the chair you’re now
reclined in.

and the Number 1 Thing You Don’t Want to Know About Your Dentist…
1> Where his ring went. He had it on before he started.



Selected from 23 submissions from 7 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:

Matt Van Opens, Janesville, WI — 1 (45th #1)
Paul Van Opens, Annapolis, MD — 2
James Knowles, Bellingham, WA — 3
Bruce Kane, Charlotte, NC — 4, 6
Chris White, Studio City, CA — 5, 7
Jaye Rowe, Providence, RI — 8
Jill Gallagher, Seattle, WA — Beauty Queen