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July 1, 2004      Share

NOTE FROM FRAN:
An experiment in Sweden offers the first hard evidence
of a decades-old theory that mutations in the mitochondria
are one of the causes of age-related illnesses.
Here’s the

complete story.

At Top5 Health and Beauty, we don’t really know *why* we age,
but we’re pretty sure it’s happening:

The Top 9 Signs You’re Getting Old

9> Not the wondering if I remembered to put on my underwear this
morning, but the “I’m wearing a full Depends” feeling I get
while waddling to the car.

8> Sex less than four times a week. (*Please* publish this, so my
wife will believe it.)

7> Contemplating that whole predestination/free will thing in the
light of omnipotence and omnibenevolence.

6> Owning ties that are older than Hanson and wider than the
Olsens.

5> Having kids.

4> Returning every gift you got your teenage sister for Christmas
because she said it was either “tight” or “sick.”

3> That subtle difference between “the earth moved” sex and “the
earth opened forming my grave” sex.

2> Grey hair? A little.
Down there? A lot.

and the Number 1 Sign You’re Getting Old…
1> Your kid joins the AARP.


.

Credits:

Selected from 28 submissions from 11 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

Asher Samuels, Jerusalem, Israel — 1
Mary Ann McDonald, Sacramento, CA — 2, 5
Slick Sharkey, Esq., Miami, FL — 2
Peter Casper, Brisbane, Australia — 3
Christa Grunewald, Leonardville, KS — 4
William Longspee, Salisbury, England — 6
Rabbi Crut, Bowling Green, OH — 6
William Prune Wickart, Danish Falls, MN — 7, 8
Joel Baskin, Brighton, MA — 9
Frieda Miner, Portland, OR — Banner Tag
Fran Fruit, Winnetka, IL — List Moderator/Governing Bo

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