The Top 7 Signs
Your Doctor Is an Alien

7> Hands you a six-quart flask, says “Fill this,” and locks you into the exam room.

6> Checks you into the ICU because he can’t detect any beating from your other hearts.

5> “Stick out both your tongues…. Whoops! Never mind.”

4> That thing you thought was her stethoscope turns out to be warm, soft and slightly ticklish.

3> Insists that you must radically increase your intake of bacon fat, chocolate and alcohol, and stop all aerobic exercise immediately.

2> The candy in the receptionist’s candy jar just moved. Its eyes.

and the Number 1 Sign Your Doctor Is an Alien…

1> You: Drive to doctor’s office in a Saturn. Doctor: Drives to his office from Saturn.

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Credits:

Selected from 44 submissions from 12 contributors.
Today’s Top 5 List authors are:

Mark Zinck, Grand Rapids, MI — 1
Kim Walker-Daniels, Sun Prairie, WI — 2
Tracy Lunquist, NW Suburbia, IL — 3, 4, 7 (Hat trick!)
Dawson Rambo, Santa Rosa, CA — 5
Ruta Baga, France — 6
Echinacea Fartlek, Mars — Banner Tag, RU/HM List Names
Fran Fruit, Winnetka, IL — List Moderator/Governing Body