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June 3, 2010      Share

Kelly Preston, aka Mrs. John Travolta,
is 47 years old. And pregnant.
47 seems a bit old to be with child, no?

The Top 8 Signs You Are Too Old to Be Pregnant

8> You furnished the nursery with three months’ worth of Social
Security checks.

7> You’re a child of the ’60s. The 1860s.

6> Your retirement complex doesn’t allow children.

5> Nursing will be easy since the baby can reach your boobs from
the floor.

4> You look forward to stretch marks instead of the wrinkled
saggy skin.

3> You tell the doctor you don’t need a disabled parking tag
because you already have one.

2> You’re both going to be toothless and eating baby food.

and the Number 1 Sign You Are Too Old to Be Pregnant…
1> By the time the baby is born you’ll both be in diapers.



Selected from 20 submissions from 6 contributors.
This week’s list authors are:

Matt Van Opens, Janesville, WI — 1 (44th #1!!!)
Judith Cottrill, Bronx, NY — 2, 6, 8 (Hat trick!)
Paul Van Opens, Annapolis, MD — 3, 4
Bruce Kane, Charlotte, NC — 5, 7
Jill Gallagher, Seattle, WA — Beauty Queen